You speak life into your day or drag through it, pinballing around reacting to mishap after unfortunate event. Just surviving. Hitting snooze until you catapult from bed at the last possible second. By day’s end, you are longing for a nap, a drink, escape, engaging in reactive avoidance, keeping you up until all hours of the night, “rebelling” against the following day. You WILL have a pleasurable moment before bed, regardless of tomorrow’s consequences! So you stay up waaaay past what is a “responsible bedtime.” Only to wake up the next morning, exhuasted, hitting snooze. Repeating it all again.
You actually have more agency than this. To set up your day with intention, as if you are the architect of your own life – because you are. Not your boss, not your partner, not reactivity to your problems. Without a built in buffer and an actual PLAN, however, emergencies and demands will construct your day for you. Vacuuming your energy, your air space, your will. Before you know it, careening around in the backseat of your own life will become the norm. Your day will be spent in reactivity to all that is thrown at you and your desire to escape and numb and shut down, will grow.
The research on quiet in the brain reveals brain neuro pathways changing and growing (https://time.com/…/how-listening-to-silence-changes…/). The Bible states “Be still and know that I am God.” Sandi Chapman, Ph.D and Chief Director at the Center for BrainHealth proposes taking (5) breaks for (5) minutes a day – away from screens, phones, etc. Her work endeavors to “enhance cognitive capacity and underlying brain systems across the lifespan.” Her research shows, that even small pauses like this can be restorative.
The creative individual part of you, that is the actual you and yours alone may never have a fighting chance to exist, as a result of the way you’ve structured your day. The truth is, we are not designed to be consumers, numbing out, just reacting to stimuli, chaos, bad news, and unpleasant bosses. In 2024, there is a lot of stimuli to which we can react. However, we have something rare in each of one of us that no one else has – it is our once in history existence. No one else is you or ever will be again. You are the expert you bringing your unique perspectives, dreams, life lessons, individuality, like none other.
If you’d like to give yourself a chance to be uniquely expressive, why not try carving out a time and space for that side of you to show up, so you can actually generate something fresh?
Here’s How:
- Get up (1) hour earlier. Pay yourself first. Give yourself the best part of you at the best part of your day.
- Focus immediately on what is working, going well, what you are proud of, and what has been going right over the last 24 hours. Reflect on the specifics of how you arrived at this goodness and how you’ll continue it.
- Pray.
- Have a cup of coffee. A good cup of coffee. It must smell good.
- Start that book.
- Plan the food truck.
- Study the stock market.
- Prepare for that adventure race.
- Laugh with your daughter.
- Walk the dog.
- Strategize for that business meeting, that irritating coworker, that pile of emails. How will you manage it, today? Rather than it managing and defining you, today?
- Plan to walk with a coworker at lunch.
And then build (5) minute breaks (5) times into each day, to clear your mind, and turn off your phone. Allow the stillness – listen to it. Breathe. Listen to the birds. Notice the life still beating within your chest.
When intrusive thoughts inevitably pound at the door of your mind or slip in unnoticed, that is your signal for “kick off” and that the games have begun. This is the whistle blowing, this is the basketball “check” this is the game. This is precisely when you need all those tools you’ve been hearing about in therapy or podcasts or mindfulness apps. The goal isn’t to get to a frictionless existence, it’s to be equipped when the battle comes to your door.
If you are allowing intrusive thoughts to stomp all over you and set your mood for you – you have not even entered the arena to play the game. You’re still in the locker room contemplating whether or not to put on your jersey. Maybe you can’t even find your jersey.
What if you knew you could take charge of your day, even in the midst of unfortunate and unappealing events? Have you noticed times when it’s all crumbling around you, yet you still find the humor in it? But there are other times when even a hang nail will send you into a rage? Your internal state affects your ability to handle giant stressors or minor irritants. The environment can’t be perfect, but YOU can be prepared for what comes your way.
So set the stage, front load, pre game and kick it all off with the Mother of All Morning Routines!